Letting Others in Our Space

Another year has come and gone, which means it’s once again time for a Rick Love art installation at the shop. While a lot of art is content to simply hang on the wall, Rick’s like to move in and live in the space. Perhaps some regulars remember his neon “Clean is Not Perfect” and video loops from years past.

All this got me thinking about the ways in which we both allow and deny people access to our space and lives.
As creatures that are both social and personal, this tug of war seems to be something with which we are always contending, and the coffee shop can seem like a laboratory of sorts where this plays out.

The reasons we go to public spots like cafés are many and varied, however, it stands to reason that one is to be around others. That said, many times we wish to sit by ourself once we’re there. The space can at once feel both like a community center and our own private oasis.

In a way this is much what I – as the owner – feel every day. I took many years of my life planning, drawing, and dreaming up the place now called “Kopplin’s”, and, now that it’s open, it has a life of it’s own and draws inspiration from others as well.

As with the shop, allowing others into our lives to leave their mark, is both difficult and ultimately rewarding. It requires us to let go of the results we had in mind and instead fully engage in the present process. Expectations need to be put aside so that they don’t interfere with the possibilities.

This is a lesson I continue to learn over the years. When we cede total control over the “spaces” in our lives and allow others to affect us, the result is magical. It’s the kind of feeling one gets when sipping on a wine or coffee that is drenched in terroir, or drinking milk that is so close to the land that you can the experience cow’s relationship with the weather and land, or of course walking into an art show in which the artist isn’t just lying there waiting to be noticed, but is actually trying to interact.

It’s a worthy challenge to seek out more experiences of connection and not just those of passivity that leave us comfortable but empty.